


Peridot, Cluster Hunter

by dontmindthedinosaur



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: After Log Date 7 15 2, Don't know yet if there is going to be Lapidot, More tags will come in the future, Or other ships, Trying to survive the hiatus by writing a fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-17
Updated: 2016-05-03
Packaged: 2018-06-02 18:10:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6577060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontmindthedinosaur/pseuds/dontmindthedinosaur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What do you do when you are stuck on a planet that is in turmoil? Survive of course.</p><p>A story of perseverance and letting go.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Planet Earth

Another pitiful, murky day on the planet Earth. Every single day was like that to her. The clouds in the sky hung a soppy green, and emitted dull grey light, like a blanket. They were having better weather today. Especially with the garbage and air pollution that contaminated the Atlantic Ocean. The glittering blue waves were replaced with junk over time. It was best to not walk on the sand, at least in this part of the city. Unless of course, if she wanted muck all over her. Just the thought repulsed her.

“Miserable Earth-day,” there was no masking her disgust. Kicking an empty, rusted can while walking along the pier, she immediately stopped when a cry was heard in the distance. Maybe it was not the best idea to be clanking things around in these parts.

To say Peridot’s anxiety had increased was an understatement. It had gone through the roofs. Every waking minute was painstakingly slow. Hour after hour, daylight seemed to drag on, refusing to end. Finally when it turned to night, she would go back home to hide, if she could really consider it a comfortable dwelling place. When the moon came out, so did the voices, wailing loudly for miles. Peridot did not dare go out during the night. It was too risky, and she would surely become a victim. The gem could not remember a night where her heart did not skip a beat. Still, she was safer in her home than she was wandering the streets during daylight. But she had to go out this time, since she needed the correct supplies.

Even to call it daylight was a compliment. The sun was always covered by Earth clouds. On one hand, the clouds kept the heat lower, resulting in a rather warm winter. On the other hand, the vegetation quickly died because of the sun’s rare appearance. It was not just like that in Beach City, but everywhere. She overheard that sum of information, while hacking into the primitive device that was called a computer.

Just for a couple hours the green gem managed to keep it running, until the machine over exhausted itself. There was no way to recover the old technology, at least with full memory. Angrily, she picked it up and smashed it onto the floor, spewing insults at the failed mechanism. That was one or the many downsides to Earth. The technology on this planet did not even compare to Homeworld’s. Not once during her time on this planet had she even seen one space ship.

The technician was mumbling, complaining to herself. She did not want to be here in Beach City. She did not want to have anything to do with this planet. Once there was a time where she loved Earth, to the point where she even stood up to Yellow Diamond, when her Authority insisted on its destruction. Peridot in turn blatantly refused, and called the yellow gem a clod to her face. Peridot laughed cynically to herself, from just thinking about it. That time was long past. Yellow Diamond was no longer the primary threat to Earth.

Now the planet was in shambles, and she was stuck here, all because of her big mouth. If things went differently when she contacted her Authority, she could have been assigned to a new task on some other planet. Events would have played out basically the same way, whether she had stayed on Earth or left. But no, she _had_ to call Yellow Diamond a clod.

She used to worship the very ground Yellow Diamond walked on, and directly served under her. Everything about her diamond radiated supremely, and she was one of the most powerful gems without question. Yellow Diamond ruled with an iron fist, but that was what Peridot liked. Her entire life’s purpose was to follow orders, aside from being a technician and certified Kindergartener. When she arrived at Earth with Jasper and Lapis Lazuli, it was the first time she directed a mission, and a team under her order. She felt so empowered, even if the primary objective was only to check on the cluster. Their mishap with the Crystal Gems rudely stole away her chance to hold some authority, but that was another matter. After seeing how fascinating and unique Earth was, Peridot rejected her diamond and joined the rebel group. Never in a million years did she think she would go directly against Yellow Diamond. But she realized, after making Earth her home, there were many things about herself even she did not understand.

Back at Homeworld, her superior was part of the Great Diamond Authority, whom all gems served without question. Peridot took that back, _almost_ all gems. The Crystal Gems, a rogue faction, refused to serve the diamond authority and broke off from Homeworld. The Crystal Gem’s defense of Earth happened several thousand years ago, as well as the events which unfolded. They were the exception to Homeworld’s cast system, an outlier. Unfortunately, Homeworld had no tolerance for gems who went against the diamonds, and thus spawned the gem war on Earth. It was a war neither side would ever forget, as many gems were shattered. Peridot read all the transcripts she could find about it, since it happened before her time. Yellow Diamond would mention it on rare occasion, but usually as a bitter example in conversation. It was encouraged, though not outlawed not to talk about the war or the Crystal Gems on Homeworld. The name of the rebel group was a taboo word.

There it was, the city’s one and only hardware store.

From the outside, the boarded up building was falling apart, blending with the other structures. Weeds were overgrowing in the sidewalk cracks, and trailing inside. The whole area was worn from the havoc which reeked through the city.

“Oh why do I have to go in _here_ ,” Peridot groaned. She really hated going in this place, even if it was an in-and-out errand. Just going near the building gave her the creeps. With that being said, entering any building in Beach City frightened her, since the whole city was abandoned. At least the gem could take whatever she wanted without being blamed for stealing. No one was going to use it anyway. The first time she attempted to take supplies out of the store, the alarm system went off. Immediately, she dropped everything she was holding and ran off, jumping into a nearby bush to hide. Trembling at the surprise noise, Peridot realized that it was non-threatening, after seeing that it resulted in no ill consequences. At least not direct ones. There were screams from a distance, which the blaring noise seemed to attract. With not much time, Peridot scrambled to gather her things at the front of the shop, and ran off before they caught up. But now she was ready. The green gem would hopefully find what she needed among the Earth junk which lined the shelves, and jump out a window. No alarm system would go off, and she would stay hidden.

Entering the store it was shadowy and chilly, even though the sun was at its zenith point in the day. Glancing down at her list, she read off what all she needed for her project. It was just a few items, fortunately, and was so very close to completion. It was just her luck that most of the supplies were available back home. All that was needed were a few chords, an appropriate output interface, and a massive antenna. If she was not able to find the last item here, she could always use several ones on those four wheeled vehicles. Steven called them cars. Although, those machines were scarce in these parts. Most of the ones Peridot found were either broken down, or completely scrapped for parts. Apparently other more primitive mechanics had got to them first, and she silently cursed her lateness.

Items for sale scattered the floor. Humans raided all the stores in Beach City before Peridot could get to them. Why did there have to be so many humans on Earth? She still did not understand how they managed to populate the Earth so quickly, when their lifespan was so short. It was a dumb question that was not relevant to her in any way, so Peridot did not care to find an answer.

Because Peridot could not interpret human scratch hanging from the ceiling, she would have to walk down each aisle to find what she needed. Most of the shelves were now bare, and the green gem doubted she would actually find anything that could work. Picking up a bottle, she could make out some of the scratch Steven called letters. He had taught her a couple letters, like “A” and “E,” but did not have the chance to explain the rest on how they relate to speech. She would have remembered it. Figuring the liquid inside would have no use, she placed it back and continued on. It’s not like she had all the time in the world to go browsing around.

Only a few minutes passed when she found a somewhat behaving machine, which could be broken apart and its output scrapped. Normally, she would have exclaimed in delight, but Peridot was feeling way too creeped out by the darkness which surrounded her. Only the faint light of the entrance illuminated the place partially, making a visible way out.

A clang of a can rung as it hit the floor.

Peridot fearfully snapped her head in the direction of the sharp noise.

_Okay something’s definitely here._

Was it one of them? The green gem did not know, there was no sign or noise of one before she entered. She prayed it was not, and rather it was some sort of stray pet. A shiver went down her back. What if it was watching her?

Tiptoeing as silently as possible, Peridot hurried on her way across the back aisle. Nothing. Thinking perhaps the small machine towards the front could be used as a temporary substitute, Peridot hurried on her way back. Even if it was a small antenna, it was at least _something._ Eyeing it from the corner of her eye, she noticed it was capable of storing tapes. Maybe it was capable of voice recording, which in that case she could continue her logs. So many days passed where Peridot had not logged in her voice recorder. It was previously broken, or rather, smashed. Her only remaining, dear personal possession, destroyed with hardly any remorse.

Putting it under her remaining arm, she briskly moved as fast as possible out of the store.

Something leaped from the shadows, terrifying the daylights out of the gem.

On impulse, Peridot gave a shriek.

It was one of her worst fears, and ugly as ever. The thing had no mouth, but made noise through its movements. Its form was smaller than most, though size did not make much of a difference from Peridot’s point of view.

No sooner had it appeared, Peridot stuck out both of her arms in a stop motion. This was the end, she was done for. There was no way she could outrun it.

Within a blink, the green gem on her head glowed bright, and it was if something was summoned from it. Too scared to look, Peridot shielded her eyes with hands covering her visor. A bang. An awful gurgling, and a noise she was unfamiliar with. Silence.

Uncovering her vision spheres, she realized her gem no longer glowed green. Scattered in front of her were sad, shattered gem shards.

_What just happened?_

She was just saved, but could not figure it out. The whole city was barren of human life. 

Hesitantly kicking over one of the shards, she clumsily picked up her dropped items, and continued outside. Unlike Steven, Garnet, and the rest of the Crystal Gems, she could not produce a bubble. Not even a small one. Apparently, that was a standard skill gems were capable of on Earth. All but her. Never had she needed it on Homeworld, and no one ever taught her. But there was no time like now, where she needed the skill more. There were many things she could not do, compared to the rest of her companions. If she believed otherwise, it would be a lie, and she was not delusional. At least so she thought. Peridot almost convinced herself she went insane, after rebuking Yellow Diamond.

Peridot felt dizzy in her forehead. It was an uncomfortable, yet slightly euphoric sensation.

There was nothing else the green gem could do with the shards, besides place them outside the store, and separate them as far from each other as possible. Over time they would regenerate, but not in the same way. They were just fragments of a mutated gem, which was also a fragment of something much more massive. The Cluster.


	2. Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot works on her machine back at the Temple.

“Why won’t this stupid thing pick up a signal?” The machine she built was working alright, but not in the way Peridot intended. Figuring it would take some time for the communication device retrieve a response, she got up and moved away from it, stretching her back in an arch. With the supplies she found at the store, she at last finished her transmitter.

She looked out through one of the temple windows, and watched the dim sun set, burying itself in the hills. It was time to lock the entrances and cover the windows. As routine, Peridot pulled down all the shades, with the help of the limb enhancers Steven gave her back at the barn. At first, she scoffed at them and shooed Steven away, but soon realized their potential. They were definitely not as high tech as her original enhancers, but served their purpose for the most part. That would be a project for the future.

Resting both hands on each hip, she looked around the temple, void of life. All the furniture and Earth machinery was left untouched in its place. Peridot remembered last time she tried to tamper with the microwave, and the Crystal Gems got upset with her. Remembering that, Peridot refrained from using anything in the temple as parts. When they came back home, the Crystal Gems would be happy to see everything in order. Especially Pearl. Peridot did not like cleaning up messes, so she tried to not make too many of them. Everything that the green gem did not pick up was placed on the large, growing pile to the side.

It was time to practice. Concentrating as much as she could, Peridot flexed her finger muscles, scrunching her forehead in the process. Opening one eye, she looked at her hands. Nothing. Every night, she tried figuring out the bubbling technique, but was unsuccessful every single time. It frustrated her to no end. Bubbling would be the most useful immediate skill to know, and by most gem standards, one of the easiest. And she couldn’t even produce one. Though Peridot was a profound technician and used-to-be certified kindergartener, she was useless. Though she helped build the drill with the Gems, that’s about all she was capable of contributing; building stuff. Apart from that, she was hardly worth anything.

Back at Homeworld, she used to be one out of several Peridots, and went by her cut and assigned number. What set her apart, besides being a traitor to Homeworld, was that she had particularly extensive knowledge about the Cluster project. The way Homeworld attempted to colonize Earth fascinated her originally. They attempted to expand the empire by new, non-traditional methods. This was mainly the reason Peridot was assigned to check up on the Cluster, because of her knowledge and skill set. If only she had future sight back at Homeworld, she may not have taken on the assignment in the first place. But to defy orders from higher ups would result in grave consequences, so Peridot never had much of a choice from the get go.

But being stranded on Earth with Steven and the Gems had changed her, Peridot had to admit. Though she wanted to believe she knew how everything worked, being a technician and mechanic, she still had much to learn. She was still learning, and could continue to do so, now that the Cluster was broken apart.

After the drill was finished, the Crystal Gems and Steven left Peridot behind at the temple, to “keep an eye out for things.” She knew the true reason they went without her, was because she was defenseless and weak. They discarded her like a tool, leaving that Lapis Lazuli behind with her. Even she abandoned her at some point, which Peridot could not recall. What even had happened to her then? A piece of her memory was missing, and it was not like she had her recorder to log about it. Though with the broken radio from the store, maybe she could create a new one.

Sitting down while crossing both legs, she grabbed her Earth tools and started rewiring the device. Concluding it would not be that difficult to create, she leaned over to grab some spare parts from the pile.

“Log date 10-23-2…” Peridot was talking to herself now, while building her new voice recorder. “I’m trying to remember _once again_ what happened before the day I reformed. I was walking around the temple searching for Pearl’s tools, and suddenly everything went black. I can’t remember what I needed the tools for, or who was with me at the time, though I was left here with Lazuli. It’s a bit _early_ to put the blame on her, but she _was_ fused as Malachite for a long time. Who knows what effects might have rubbed off from that fusion? The communicator is at last complete, and am still waiting for a response signal. Who knows how long that will take?” The green gem paused for a moment, “Peridot, end log.”

Initially when Lapis Lazuli was taken in by the Crystal Gems, she was a wild card. No one knew how she would react in any moment, and Steven was the only one she ever talked to. When she and Lazuli were left at the temple, the blue gem had only said a select few words to Peridot out of necessity. She was non-responsive, but it was not because she could not speak. It was because she refused to, and Peridot supposed the reason was understandable, though it drove her mad. Lazuli was trapped in Pearl’s mirror for thousands of years, taken as a prisoner in custody by her home, used for ill reasons by Jasper, and interrogated by the green gem. Without a moment’s freedom, she subjected herself into fusing with Jasper, only to trap her in the ocean. Steven explained everything to Peridot when they were alone in the barn, in hopes to enlighten Peridot on Lazuli’s gloomy mood.

“Have a little patience with her, she’s been through a lot,” Peridot remembered him say.

“No, you don’t understand!” Peridot put both hands on each of his arms. “I was her interrogator on the ship we arrived on! She was captured right as she returned home, and it may have well been with my hands. To her, all Homeworld gems are the same! She hates me Steven, hates me! Don’t leave me here with her!”

“But you’re not a Homeworld gem anymore, you’re a Crystal Gem! You’re one of us! I’m sure over time Lapis will recognize how much you’ve changed.”

“I’m begging you, take me along! I don’t want to be shattered, I have still so much to give!”

“That’s it!” Steven exclaimed with large eyes.

“What’s ‘it’?”

“You should give Lapis a gift!”

“Pshhh,” Peridot scoffed at the idea, and lifted her hands in a shrug, “a gift, why of course. Why didn’t I think of that before?  I’ll just walk right up to her give her some Earth trash present, and then everything will be happy and dandy between us.”

“Not just anything will do! It has to be something special to you, or something she might value.”

“How about a mirror?” Peridot gave him a devious grin.

“ _Peridot.”_

“I was just kidding. Let’s see, something of value…” Peridot could not think of anything that the blue gem would like. She would have no use for flowers, since they grew everywhere around Beach City. She could just go over and pick a bunch if she really wanted to. There was always Earth food, though Peridot did not think explaining the ‘digestive system’ was a particularly good idea either. When Amethyst explained to process food, it disgusted her and immediately regretted her decision to eat. She should have never listened agreed to Amethyst and Pearl’s proposal to partake in such earth ritual.

There was nothing the technician thought of, which could suffice as an adequate present. “I can’t think of anything,” she ruffled her hair with both hands, “ugh, why is this such a difficult decision?!” 

“Well, you could give her something that’s special to you.”

“I don’t _have_ anything of value anymore, ever since you all discarded my limb enhancers. And I wouldn’t give them to her anyway.”

“What about your tape recorder, the one I gave you?”

“I need that Steven, it helps me from going crazy!”

“You could share it with her, or just let her borrow it! It would give you both something to do, and give her an excuse to talk!”

“…I _suppose_ I could agree to that, as long as she doesn’t override my previous logs.”

“We can always get her a tape of her own, so you don’t have to worry about that happening.”

“A tape?” Peridot said, confused.

“You know, the thing you put inside of the tape recorder?”

“I’ve never attempted to open it, so I had no idea there were singular tapes until now.”

Steven searched the packed boxes in the barn for a spare tape, but failed to find one. Peridot assumed it would be okay for a while if she and Lazuli shared the device for a few days. Managing to find some gift wrapping materials, Steven taught Peridot on the couch upstairs how to wrap a present. He seemed really excited, and Peridot could not help but feel excited as well. It was a kind gesture, and Steven was a kind person. His kindness made her feel a different kind of happy, which she did not experience on Homeworld.

Right as they finished and went outside the barn, they noticed Lazuli walking in their direction.

“Hey Lapis! Peridot has something for you!” He gestured to the small gem, keeping his pose.

The blue gem looked first at Steven, then fixed her gaze on Peridot, with distrusting eyes and a frown.

Still excited yet nervous to give her first gift, Peridot presented the wrapped present to her, extending both arms out. Lazuli did not reach for it, but stood glaring down at her. Peridot moved a few inches forward to her. “Here, it’s a gift from me! I know you’re mad, but I hope maybe someday we can talk.”

Hesitantly she undid the bow, and opened the box. Inside was Peridot’s tape recorder.

“I thought perhaps we could log date our days together, after everyone leaves to take care of the Cluster,” she twiddled her thumbs. “It’s pretty valuable to me, so we could share it for the time being, until you get your own.”

“I don’t want anything to do with you.”

“I realize that, but all I’m-“

“No, you listen. Everything I’ve ever had was taken away from me, even my freedom. What makes you think that I would ever share my thoughts or feelings, especially with you?!

“Lazuli, please-“

“You and Homeworld treated me as a prisoner and destroyed my only opportunity of having a normal life again, so I’ll destroy something you hold dear!” Taking it out of the box, Lapis threw the recorder down, as forcefully as she could.

On impact, it smashed, and warped shape. The tape with her logs seemed fine, but the recorder was undoubtedly destroyed.

“No!” Peridot could feel tears swelling in her eyes, and turned to Steven, “Why do I ever listen to you clods?!” Unable to face the two in such an embarrassing state, she ran away as fast as she could. 

In the distance she could hear Steven talking to Lapis, “…now it’s too late, and she’s never coming back again.

No sooner when he said that, did a drone from Homeworld appear in the sky, likely sent to exterminate her. She did call Yellow Diamond a clod right to her face, and knew her actions would not go unpunished. Running back to Steven and Lazuli, she went to hide in the barn. When the drone persisted in following her, Peridot hid behind Steven, believing she was about to be shattered once and for all. Though he was ready to protect her, Lapis went ahead of them both, giving Peridot a glance. With a few flicks of her hand, she summoned a giant water hand from nearby puddles, and slammed the drone to the ground. Instantly it was completely wrecked. Peridot had never seen anything like that before. Lapis saved her, when she could have let her be shattered.

“Holy smokes.” It was all Peridot could say.

“I did this for Steven,” Lapis turned around with violet eyes, “so don’t go thinking, I did that to save you.” With that, she walked away into the barn. Steven and Peridot looked at each other.

“I’m sorry Peridot that things didn’t work out like we wanted. But it’s ultimately the thought that counts, and I think you’re pretty great for trying, Steven said. Peridot blushed from the flattery. She was not the best at receiving compliments. “Let’s check out the drone. Maybe there are parts that you can use in the future!”

Lapis Lazuli was still in a down mood by the time Steven and the rest of the Gems left. But at least tension was not as bad as it used to be between them. She would actually acknowledge the smaller gem’s presence. Sometimes.

But then the Cluster broke loose from the Earth’s core. A loud, blaring noise ripped through the atmosphere, and it was definitely not thunder. The abomination was supposed to be larger than the size of Earth, swallowing it whole. That’s what the original plans told, and kindergarten files projected. But that was not the case. Instead of being one massive artificial fusion, it was broken apart, and bits of the Cluster scattered the Earth. It had to be the Crystal Gems’ doing. Peridot also noted there were not as many small Cluster fusions as she estimated. That was probably due to the Gems as well. But there was still plenty of Cluster monsters, and were found in all parts of the world, as Steven’s TV reported. Beach City was soon forced to evacuate, leaving the two gems behind.

It was soon around that time when she reverted back into her gem. Once she regenerated, Peridot found herself high up on some shelf, out of anyone’s reach. It took her a couple days to get down, and she was only successful because she fell off the shelf. There was no way she got up there herself. Someone else had to have placed her recovering gem there.

There was no sign that Steven, Garnet, Amethyst, or Pearl were around the temple. Though they were most likely shattered during the catastrophe, Peridot kept working on a device to make contact with them. The technician had no idea why she bothered, but giving up would also make no sense. If they were still alive, the better her chance of survival would be. That, and the temple was different without their presence.

Stretching her fingers, she held the radio in her hands. It was complete, and now she could log date once more. She pulled the unbroken tape she carried in her pocket, and slid it into the socket. Peridot reiterated her words into the machine, careful not to leave any detail of Earth’s condition or her situation out. Going upstairs and plopping on Steven’s empty bed, she listened to the older logs, before the Cluster ever emerged. Log date 7-15-2 was her favorite now out of all of them, because she not only heard her voice, but Garnet’s as well. It also reminded the green gem she was really alone. Peridot looked up blankly towards the ceiling, wishing she could think of nothing.

Static and a muffled voice broke the silence in the temple. Jumping off the bed, Peridot ran over to the radio. It was picking up a response signal.


	3. Contact

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot gets a response.

Peridot jumped off the bed and zoomed over to the machine. Dropping on all fours she brought her head as close to the speakers as it could get.

“Please, please, please be something,” Peridot prayed. Turning up the volume to just the right amount, a voice could be heard, although drowned by static. If only she still had her limb enhancers, she could use the communication system installed in the right arm, and she would not be having this problem.

“Is this Peridot?” Even with the static, she knew that voice anywhere. It was Pearl. The response continued. “Are you and Lapis still in Beach City? As you probably know, we managed to break apart the Cluster, but it still proved to be too much for us to handle. Now there are artificial gem fusion monsters roaming the Earth. We can still be thankful our home is still around.” She sounded desperate and tired. “We drilled into the Cluster, and it blasted us all away. I managed to survive the impact with Amethyst, though she’s in her gem,” she paused, “right now, we are looking for Steven. Garnet… Garnet was taken by the Cluster.”

_No… not Garnet…_

The message continued, “After we find Steven, we will return to the temple at once. In the meantime, stay out of sight and don’t do anything risky. I’m sure it’s not the case with Beach City, but all around the world riots among humans have broken out. It makes no sense why they don’t just work together, but that aside, it puts you two in jeopardy. Though some of Beach City’s citizens know us, other humans don’t. Once they see your gems, they’ll associate you with those monsters. Please, just lay low for the time being. We’ll be back to sort everything out.” The response ended there in a fizzle.

“How in the world are we going to sort this out?! This is a catastrophe! It’s still the end of our home as we know it!”

Peridot wired the machine, sending out a new signal to Pearl. “Pearl, Beach City is completely abandoned, besides counting the Cluster fusions! Lazuli disappeared, and I’m the only one here at the temple! Let me know if you get my message!” Now she was panicking. Peridot would be left by herself until Steven was found. Steven, despite being some sort of gem hybrid, was surprisingly capable. Though Pearl was searching for him, the most logical scenario was that he was taken by the Cluster as well. She probably did not want to admit the truth to herself. Peridot swallowed hard. First Garnet, now Steven. The only thing she somewhat valued on this planet were the Crystal Gems, and they left her.

A boom outside and a flash of light echoed in the house, making the technician yelp and shudder. But sound was not from the Cluster fusions. Rain began to patter the deck outside, proceeding in a loud, heavy shower. Steven had introduced rain to her when the Crystal Gems were out on a mission, which initially terrified her. But once he opened the door and started spinning around in it, it suddenly did not seem as threatening. Feeling a raindrop for the first time was one of the most profound moments on Earth, which she shared with her friend Steven.

Wanting to believe, like Pearl, that he was still alive, would be denying the most probable outcome. Her first friend on Earth who believed in her, probably the first friend she ever had in her lifetime, was gone either way. The rain pouring outside seemed to mock her thoughts, and for once, rain was not a pleasant thing.

There was no way she was going to take it. Boldly she unlocked the front door and went outside, walking down the stairs to the beach, but not before closing the door behind her. The sand, now wet, stuck to the soles of her feet, but Peridot did not care. The green gem stopped in her tracks where the ocean tide met her toes. She had no idea what she was doing now, or in general. Her life no longer had any purpose or aim.

“Steven!” Shouting angrily into the dark clouds, Peridot called his name, as if just the mention could bring him back. “Why did you have to go with those clods? If you had simply stayed here, you would still be alive!” Peridot was mad at the Crystal Gems for leaving, and for letting Steven go with them. She was mad at Garnet for losing so easily to the Cluster, even though they only had a slim chance of survival to begin with. She was mad at Pearl for not opening her eyes to the truth, mad at Lazuli for leaving, mad at herself.

Yellow Diamond had personally sent her to check up on the Cluster in its final stage of development. Though she was not the one who originally planted the artificial fusion in the Earth’s core, she did hold responsibility for its emergence. This was something she kept secret from the Crystal Gems, too guilty to admit it. Yes she did not insert the Cluster to begin with, but before the monster entered its final stage, Peridot could have had an opportunity to terminate it. When she visited the Kindergarten with Steven, she could have tried using her technical skills to program into the system and stop its development. But she was still partially loyal to Yellow Diamond, and had faith her authority would send a ship before its emergence. This was before she ended up seeing the Earth for what it really was, and decided to stand up for the insignificant planet and its organic life, and assist the Gems with the drill’s construction. Meanwhile building the drill, Peridot thought she could persuade her diamond to end the experiment, by alluring her with Earth’s resources. Yellow Diamond held ultimate control of the Cluster back at Homeworld, and if she favored the idea to reserve Earth’s unique capitals, the yellow gem would change her decision. Buying into that gamble in the first place was her greatest miscalculation, as if Yellow Diamond would rationally negotiate with a Peridot. That’s when Peridot discovered what a clod her diamond was.

The first chance she had, Peridot warped back to the Kindergarten, hoping she could hack into the system terminate the Cluster project herself. But Yellow Diamond had locked the project, so that only she had authorization. The experiment was so late in its stage, that there would be no hope in stopping its growth. Breaking down in tears inside the Kindergarten control room, she knew she was responsible. If only she tried to end it during her last visit, perhaps she would have succeeded, even though it was a heavily secured project. Or maybe if she cooperated with the Crystal Gems, they could have stopped it sooner. But her confusion blinded her. Because she even had a tiny chance at axing the Cluster, and not once tried, Peridot hated herself. This mess was her fault.

“I’m sorry!” As much as she shouted, it did not make her feel any less small. She was finally admitting the guilt which riddled her every day, and it was painful. A ‘sorry’ would not change anything. She knew that, but Peridot did not know what else to do. What could she do? She was just a Peridot, a small, trivial technician.

A screech pierced her ears, coming from behind. The small gem whipped around, but standing on two legs and six arms was a Cluster mutant, and it was charging right at her. If Peridot ran back to the temple, the monster would only follow and discover the place. The only thing she could do was try to outrun it.

But the ocean decided to act before her. A large wave, at least fifteen feet tall, rose up from the charcoal gray body of water. It crashed down on the beast, knocking it over, avoiding Peridot altogether. It retreated into its gem, and shards scattered the sand. As soon as the wave emerged, it withdrew back into the ocean, revealing an all too familiar gem in its place. 

_Lazuli._

She stood up straight, staring at Peridot. The smaller gem always felt somewhat nervous around her. “Are you alright?” It was one of the only times Lapis initiated talk with Peridot first.

“Yeah,” she brushed off sand from her knees, “but I-“

“Okay. I should be going,” but as Lapis started to turn around, Peridot grabbed her arm. That made the ocean gem furious.

“You have no right to grab me,” she said, suddenly enraged.

Peridot released her grip, regretting that decision as well. But she was not going to let Lapis leave without answers. “Where have you been all this time? _Why_ did you disappear? The Crystal Gems wanted us to stay at the temple, and you just vanished with no note or anything?”

“What makes you believe I owe you anything? I owe you nothing, you’re the reason why I’m stuck on this planet again in the first place!”

They were finally talking, but it was not how Peridot wanted them to start conversing. It was if Lapis could read right through her, into her guilt. There was nothing she could say which would defend her actions, because the blue gem was right. Out of all the Crystal Gems, Peridot was probably the last one Lapis wanted to find.

But Peridot was still defensive, “You don’t owe me anything, but you can treat me like another gem!”

“After _you_ treat me like a prisoner?” She turned to face the ocean again, “For most of my existence, that’s what I’ve been. Everybody else’s prisoner.”

She had to make things right with the older gem, but Peridot did not know where to start. Reading emotions was not exactly her strongest suit.

“I’m sorry.”

The taller gem froze, as if Peridot said she was going to make Lapis her prisoner once more.

“What?”

“I’m… sorry?” Twiddling her fingers around, Peridot cursed herself in her head.

But the other gem was already hovering over her, moonlight outlining her silhouette. More silence.

“You’ve been through a lot, and it’s partially because of me. I’ve made many mistakes on this pitiful planet, and one of them in not listening to you. I hope you are able to accept my apology.” When she spoke to Lapis, Peridot pretended like she was talking into her voice recorder. Somehow it was easier to confide in an inanimate object which would never judge her. But it still did not make her feel better. This could be a very good thing to say, or the apology could leave her shattered.

“Besides Steven, that was the first time anyone has said sorry to me.”

_In her whole life?_

“I will never be able to forget what you, or the other Gems did. But I will do my best to consider your apology. We should go before more of those fusion mutants come.”

“Excuse me, go? Where?”

“Back to Steven.”


	4. Departure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot leaves with Lapis to see Steven.

Peridot almost did a backflip when she heard his name. “Steven’s not shattered?!”

“I found him floating in his bubble along the coast with his lion. He was weak, but definitely not shattered. Not even cracked. Well, more like I felt him floating.”

“Where’s he? I need to talk to him.”

“Like I said, that’s where we’re going to see Steven.” Lapis walked toward the rising and falling waves, and as she placed her foot down, Peridot almost expected her to wade in. Instead, she treaded on top of the ocean beneath her, which obeyed her command.

_Typical. Should’ve expected that._

“Well? Are you coming or not?”

Shaken out of her fixation, Peridot stuttered, “Y-yeah, I am.” But then she remembered something. Pearl.

“Wait, I need to get something from the house.” The blue gem just gave one nod in response, quickly turning her head away.

The small gem scrambled back to the Temple, fast enough so she would not keep Lapis waiting too long. She seemed pretty miffed and apprehensive towards her, and for reason. Peridot could not deny what she did to Lapis was ill of her. She hurt the blue gem in a way she herself could not quite understand. But understanding what she did was wrong, it made sense why Lapis Lazuli ultimately detested her.

Hurrying through the door, she opened the closet under the stairs. The first thing in front of her was Steven’s distinct cheeseburger backpack. The thoughtful boy had left it for both Peridot and Lapis, in case they faced an emergency. Even he realized the situation he and the gems were to face was dire. Inside at the top were a few granola bars and bags of chips. _Didn’t Steven know she hated food?_

Amethyst and Pearl had tricked her into eating Earth food, which organic life had to consume in order to not die. What a pathetic way to expire. After she ate the entire object, the purple quartz gem whispered in her ear about creating a digestive system and tract in her form, in order to expel it. The whole process was petrifying, and she could see Pearl shudder just a tad. Anyway, she had to get rid of it from her body somehow, and at least Amethyst was _kind_ enough to enlighten her about the procedure.

Rummaging through the rest of the bag, there was an extra flashlight stick, a deflated inner tube, a vile with some sort of liquid, and… Towards the bottom she felt an envelope. It said “To Peridot.”

“Why not “To Peridot _and_ Lapis?” She asked, talking to no one in particular. She would have to read it later, because Lapis was still waiting for her. If she were lucky, Lapis would still be there by the time she went back.

She grabbed the pack and slung it over her shoulders, next going towards her machine. Though the wires may not mix well around water, she could still fiddle around with it in hopes of connecting with Pearl. Peridot did not know when Pearl and Amethyst would be back at the Temple. But if they did arrive before she got back, they would be worried. Especially Pearl, as she tended to do so more regularly.

What could she leave behind to let them know she would be alright? Then she had an idea, one she really did not want to go through with.

But there was no other way. She did not know how to read or write, with the exception of what Steven taught her. And she was no drawing prodigy by any means. That left one last approach.

Sighing heavily, she pulled out her tape recorder, and started a new log date.

“This is a continuation of Log Date 10-23-2. Lazuli has finally decided to show her face again, and informed me of Steven’s condition. In her words, he is alright, but still weak. She wants me to go with her to see him, and I have no clue where we’re going. All I know is that she’s waiting for me outside, and I need to see Steven and understand what happened.”

She paused for a slight second. “Pearl, Amethyst, if you’re listening to this, Steven’s alright. We’re all alright. I’ll be back obviously, since I’m leaving my tape recorder with you for the time being. Oh and one more thing, I’m also taking my communication device, to rewire a couple parts.”

Setting it down on the kitchen counter, she drew an elementary arrow on a piece of paper, pointing to it. Reluctantly, she locked the Temple’s front screen door behind her, and could see Lapis still waiting for her. The blue gem’s arms were folded tightly, she noticed a distance away. Hopefully she would not be too annoyed.

“What took you so long?” Lapis said in a snap, as Peridot shuffled over the sand.

“I was not gone for that long.”

“Fine, let’s just… go, before any Cluster fusions come. I heard some wailing in the distance, and it sounds like they’re moving this way.” Wings made entirely out of water sprung out from Lapis’ gem, and she whipped around behind Peridot.

“What are you doing?” The technician exclaimed.

“Carrying you,” and light a lighting strike, bolted into the sky.

Peridot could not even scream or think. She had driven Homeworld ships at top speeds, but this was different. This was terrifying.

Lapis seemed to get a sick kind of amusement out of her consternation. It was all in those violet eyes of hers.

Lapis definitely hated her.

The ocean gem flew so fast, Peridot could not process where they were. She guessed beneath the clouds, over the ocean. In no time at all, Lapis slowed down and landed on a beach, different from the beach which they departed from. The air was warmer, and the foliage was different. She did not know how far away they were from the Temple, but by calculating the sun’s position in the sky, somewhere south. But the place, no, the island was familiar to her. This was the island where Malachite and Alexandrite fought. And now they were back.

The landing was rough. Once Peridot planted her feet on the ground, she immediately fell face first into the sand from experiencing vertigo. Pushing herself up with her hands and brushing off the sand, she saw that Lapis was already walking ahead, not bothering to wait for her to recover.

 _Steven was here this whole time?_ _Why didn’t he simply warp back to the Temple?_

On the other side of the island, there was a warping pad. Not only had she seen it, but she and Steven used it. Was it smashed? Why had he not used it already?

Leading her up a cliff path and into the mouth of a large cave, Lapis stood to the side and hummed something. A tune of some sort.

Behind a boulder, a watermelon Steven appeared with a shell necklace and spear.

Peridot jumped back in surprise. She had seen them before during her last visit, but the motion the melon made just caught her off guard.

It seemed to recognize Lapis, repeating the same tune back. But it turned and gave Peridot a mildly uncomfortable glare, staring her down.

“It’s okay, she’s no threat.”

 _No threat?_ She did not intend to harm anyone, her intentions were clear. But it sounded more like Lapis was calling out her insignificance.

It seemed to believe her. The lone watermelon Steven beckoned them to follow it deeper in the cave. As they went down, torches lit the sides, giving an orange glow.

At the end, they came to an opening, where pools of water scattered the vast area. There were watermelon Stevens everywhere. They were of different heights, dressed differently, and of different ages as it seemed. And they all turned to look at their guests.

But they did not seem upset or disgruntled, rather calm or even happy. Peridot knew the organic lifeforms were not aggressive, at least not anymore. Steven had told the technician about how they came into being, and their initial unstable past.

A very old watermelon came up to the trio, looking at Peridot first and then Lapis.

“She wants to see Steven,” she said, quieter than usual.

Nodding, the old fruit took Peridot’s hand and led her through the crowd. Lapis followed. The place seemed endless, as watermelon Stevens bustled about, obstructing any view ahead.

“Where is she taking us?” The green gem whispered to the taller, in hopes the old watermelon would not hear her.

But all she got was silence, and Peridot grunted. She was getting seriously irked at Lapis already, and they had only departed from the Temple an hour ago. That is, more than she was before. But at least she was trying to make some sort of effort into treating the other gem like another being. And she would not stoop down to Lapis’ level, as much as she was tempted to. Steven would get on her case for it anyway.

Whenever she said something rude or did anything wrong, Steven usually pointed it out to her in his caring type of way. She messed up a lot and was still messing up. And she would never admit this, but she appreciated Steven for his honesty. Most of what she said or did that was “bad” was not out of malicious objectives, but from her own ignorance. She was not one to think herself as ignorant, but lately it seemed to prod in her mind, replaying all the mistakes she made like a movie.

Though she knew she was not stupid, she sure felt like it these days. Maybe being around Steven again would lift her spirit.

But when they came to the end of the cavern, the old watermelon woman pointed down to a blanket and a large nest of leaves, where many watermelon Steven women were. And cradled in the arms of one of the melons was Steven. But something was wrong here, he was not in his usual form.

He was a human baby.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure how long this story is going to be, but should be at least ten chapters. Feedback/advice/kudos/constructive criticism appreciated!


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